مستخدم نزيل
7 مايو 2025
Let me start by saying I’ve slept in questionable roadside motels, but this “hotel” redefined *bad*. From the moment I arrived, it was a parade of disasters. The check-in took 45 minutes because the front desk staff were too busy arguing over whose turn it was to “handle the angry guy with the broken AC.” Spoiler: That guy became me. My room looked like it hadn’t been updated since the ‘80s, complete with carpet that crunch-grunted underfoot—I don’t wanna know why. The “double bed” was a spring-loaded torture device disguised as a mattress, and the pillows smelled like regret and mothballs. The “view” was a symphony of dumpsters and a flickering neon sign that turned the room into a strobe light party for one. Cleanliness? Ha. The bathroom had a hair bouquet in the shower drain (not mine), and the towels were so thin they doubled as see-through scarves. The shower alternated between Arctic blast and lava eruption, and the toilet made a noise like a dying walrus every time I flushed. At 3 AM, I was serenaded by a symphony of hallway shouts, slamming doors, and what I can only assume was a tap-dancing convention upstairs. When I called the front desk, they said, “Yeah, that’s the party floor.” Thanks for the heads-up *after* check-in. The “complimentary breakfast” was a sad cart of stale cereal and lukewarm coffee guarded by a staff member who looked like they’d rather be anywhere else. Oh, and they charged me $25 extra for “amenities” — which I can only guess was the privilege of surviving the night. The final insult? The wifi password was “RelaxHere123.” Irony truly is dead. Do yourself a favor: Sleep in your car, pitch a tent, or literally hug a cactus for comfort. Anything’s better than this place. -10/10.
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